About
The Associated Guess was founded on a conviction we have never apologized for: the country deserves hard-hitting journalism - clear-eyed, unsentimental, and unwilling to trade accuracy for access.
We studied the major outlets closely. We attended the briefings, read the earnings calls, and noted how often “breaking” meant “gently confirmed by a person who would not be quoted.” We concluded that if we wanted reporting that actually landed, we would have to pursue it the old-fashioned way: assign the story, verify the details, and publish before the world had a chance to contradict us by happening differently.
Our newsroom does not run on tips from unnamed officials, leaked slide decks, or the slow accident of events. We run on editors who ask hard questions, correspondents who file from places that sound plausible, and a standards desk that treats every dateline as a promise. When a source speaks on the record, they are on the record. When we describe a policy, a protest, or a squirrel-related municipal ordinance, we describe it with the gravity it deserves.
We are independent. We are obsessive about craft. We believe the reader should finish an article slightly more informed and significantly more concerned than when they started - whether the subject is the economy, the climate, or the behavioral standards now expected of smart refrigerators.
If something on our front page strikes you as unlikely, read it again. Read the quotes. Follow the logic. We trust you to draw your own conclusions. We have already drawn ours.
SERIOUS NEWS. ABSURD WORLD. - The Editors
Our newsroom
The Associated Guess maintains a distributed editorial staff — writers, editors, and a standards desk that treats every dateline as a promise and every quote as an opportunity. We file from invented bureaus in Millfield, Portland, Geneva, and wherever the story requires a municipal official with a clipboard.
Meet the team on our Newsroom page. For syndication and reprint questions, see Reprints & permissions.
Who publishes this
The Associated Guess is a satirical news property operated by Laughing Dragons Productions, an independent media and maker studio. This site is part of the Laughing Dragons portfolio alongside games, tools, podcasts, and shop projects hosted at laughing-dragons.com.
Every headline here is fictional parody - written in deadpan news style, not reported as fact. We publish new stories daily. For tips, corrections, or rights questions, see our Contact page.
More from Laughing Dragons
- Laughing Dragons Productions - studio hub (games, kids show, tools, shop)
- Chittin & Chattin - podcast
- Studio contact form - general inquiries across the portfolio
Publisher email: [email protected]
Editorial standards
We maintain written standards for how stories are labeled, corrected, and kept clearly separate from factual reporting. Read our Editorial Standards and Corrections pages before sharing or citing anything from this site.